Why does it feel, recently, that there's not enough time?
Perhaps thirty-somethings know how I feel. How, oh how, did I get to being 28? Where did all the time go? Why do I still feel exactly as I did when I was eighteen?
It's not ageing that bothers me. I can grow old as disgracefully as I like, and the best thing is - done properly - I can just be called eccentric. Or a cat lady. Ageing I've come to terms with. (Also I work with a fabulous aesthetic nurse who can halt time so there is that.)
The thing that bothers me the most is there's just not enough time for everything I want to do. I'm fully aware that ten years have passed me by since the day I turned 18 and thought 'I'm seeeeeeeeeh machuuuuuuure'. But what have I really done with my twenties?
I started learning Mandarin - and failed.
I started learning Thai - and failed.
I went backpacking a few weeks every year.
I got married.
And divorced.
And divorced.
I built houses.
I tore them down.
I tore them down.
I met amazing people.
I lost amazing people.
I fulfilled one life's ambition: I did smoosh my face into a chocolate cake. That was AWESOME.
So you'll see on the navbar at the top of this post a new page, 50 things before 2015. Next year I'll be thirty, and I've allowed life to just pass me by for some reason. There are things I've been desperate to do but things, work, family, friends, have come first.
Not any more.
I want to see everything. I want to travel and try new things. See, people can spend their life focusing on researching one species of animal or one city or one lake and still not scratch the surface. So no wonder I feel like life's flown away. I'm not asking for forever (ok, I want forever) but I feel like I should be making the most of the time I do have.
I love a challenge, and putting these goals in writing means I have the motivation to make each one happen.
.jpg)
0 comments :
Post a Comment