Social Networks: Whose life are you sharing anyway?

A new survey revealed that one third of UK women lies about their life at least once a month on social networking sites. The other two thirds were lying at the time of questioning. Because we all do it. The things they most exaggerate about are what they’re doing at the moment (like pretending they’re out having a good time when they’re home alone) and how much they’ve had to drink, as well as jobs and holidays.

We should probably all be terribly shocked that we’re deceiving our friends. But we’ve all done it, we all know everyone else does it, and we can spot it a mile off.

I’m not trying to make the women of Britain out to be creepy snakes in the grass. But where we do not out rightly lie, we do selectively share.

And it just so happens that we share the things we think are most impressive. When we share the bad things, we never say “I was an utterly foul madam this week, and no one deserved the barrage of abuse I gave them”. Or if we do say it, it’s probably to get brownie points from a public apology – because what kind of person really goes into that level of detail on the internet? Only the chronic over-sharer, and I’m a firm believer that such people thrive on any kind of attention, even if it means pretending their life is a car crash.
What’s more, I don’t just do it on social networking sites. I do it each and every single day:

I didn’t tell the woman on the train that most of the time I hate my degree and spend hours upon hours bored out of my tiny, little brain.

When I advise younger girls on how best to behave as a teenager, I certainly don’t tell them the kind of things I did (like not going to English class for two years... sorry Mum).

I don’t share all the times I mucked up baking: the Yule Log disaster of Christmas 2012 is never, ever, mentioned.

We live in a world defined by achievement and picture perfect, chocolate-box living. All social networks do is give another window into our world. But just like your Grandmother was selective about what she told the neighbours, I’m selective about what I tweet.

A leading psychologist has admitted that, while we get temporary happiness portraying all the positives in our lives real or not, it actually leaves people feeling more isolated in the long run. So, as a solution, Pencourage has been set up to get around the problem. It’s a completely anonymous online confession booth of sorts. And it ‘bridges the enormous gulf between what people actually say and what they really think’. There's commenting and interaction with other anonymous people, just as there is on any other social networking site. So you're free to keep your positive tweets, while confessing your deepest, darkest thoughts elsewhere.

Whilst people may start out with good intentions, once they build up a regular correspondence, it’s hard to see how the need to impress won’t raise it’s green head once more.

Plenty of social networking sites already allow anonymity. Very few of us want to admit we’re less than perfect. We need to stop striving for the impossible and learn to be comfortable in our lives and happy with our choices. Facelessness is not the answer.

Would you admit to selective sharing? Or have you outright lied about being at a star-studded party when you're actually sitting at home with a cuppa and six pack of Creme Eggs? Tell us in the comment section.